Too much to handle :(

There are momments in life that you don’t know where you stand, where you look, what you eat, why you breathe, why the whole World revolves around an economical aspect?

Recently I have very much come to realize that the World I live in doesn’t revolve around anything. People make up their own path of choice, opportunities come and others go, some pass by simply to give you a wake up call, others to make you focus, and others to make you be thankful that you are on of those people who has a home to live, who has a job, who has ways to support yourself and be independent.

Many people in this country do not know or do not have the slightest idea of what tomorrow is, what will tomorrow bring to them, what will tomorrow change that I haven’t yet endured? These are many thoughts and cries of the people who live in the 3rd World, people that have to work hard to get the very little they have, although part of this "lower class" is simply sitting back and letting the time pass, relaxing each day as it comes, sleeping all day and at night become "alive" in a dormant state of hypnoses, or even in a kind of Zombie state.

My friends keep telling me I have allot of qualities, allot of good things in me and I cannot see it, I cant see the whole me, the whole percentage that makes people "stick" to me, most times when I am all alone in my bed with my teddy bear I stop and think (Saturday night was one of those nights). What am I doing here in this country? I came here so focused, so full of energy and now look at me. I became so "Egyptian" with the whole IBM wording like Ana Paula keeps telling me.

IBM stands for:

I (Inshallah) - By the grace of God

B (bokra) - Tomorrow

and

M (ma3lesh) - Sorry

Yes its true, no matter where you are from, no matter where you have lived, living in Egypt totally changes who you are, I have changed in the sense that now I really do not know what to do, I want to get a better position within my Company or if the opportunity arises into a another company, but there aren’t any opportunities at the moment, my job has become boring, and although I have tried to make changes, improve the quality of services (as much as I can fiddle with) I am stuck.

YES, I AM STUCK

Studying is not an option at the moment, although I don’t really have any other choice, I want to do more things, want to take care of my health but I cant give a fuck about anything.

Maybe its time to pack my bags and get back to "REALITY" ...........

What is Reality ?